Do you know this man? I’d like to, someday.

1. SMART almost uncomfortably smart. like, probably had problems fitting in as a child

2. WORLD-CHANGING world-changing. someone with the passion and strength to make things happen for himself and his loved ones. doesn’t have to be prominent or leader, but has that energy and drive to make things around him better.

3. ETHICAL extremely ethical: liberated, feminist, socially aware, kind, environmentally aware

4. PASSIONATE in love, in family, and in life ambition. someone who wants to create together an amazing life enriched by interesting friends and experiences. cultural, social and recreational drive to experience life at its fullest.

5. MOTIVATED very motivated to work on the relationship and take extremely good care of me and himself. pours energy into making our “together” better.

6. GROUNDED self-esteem and grounding, or a desire to work on self-esteem and grounding, sufficient to stabilize our efforts at a relationship and to prevent cheating, etc. real guy and not an asshole. very sweet and balanced.

7. ATTRACTIVE chemical attraction, even if it takes some time to develop. i know from experience the physical (as in appearance) side of this is almost irrelevant. i can never predict what will “do it” for me, and i suspect it’s all a matter of his mind & personality

8. LOVING loves me, my entire family, especially my kids.

9. KIND treats people well, makes it a priority to reach out and care for those around him

10. SUPPORTIVE he is a true partner with his own interests, ambitions and career and he drives me on to achieving ever better things

11. CONSIDERATE not so wrapped up in his own life that he fails to notice his impact on those around him

12. SEXY yeah, things in bed must rock. but again the scope of this is not limited to “norms” of what is sexy.

13. FUNNY personality galore, but not the showy kind that comes from low self-esteem. great fun to just be around.

Why aren’t daters better networkers?

I mean, for chrissakes, we’re all fundamentally looking for 1) more ways to meet interesting and potentially interested people and 2) more interesting and potentially interested people to meet. Well who better to compare notes with than someone else who is out and about on the scene?

Folks on dating sites and their ilk are always so goal-focused. All “are YOU my girlfriend???” And then if not, cutting all contact and ties and diving after the next possibility. Pu-leeze.

Don’t get me started about the artificial sense of competition. If two people are eventually going to hit it off in a really big, awesome, lifelong way, having someone “hotter” or “smarter” or whateverer around is not such a substantial impediment. Let’s team up here, people.

What we should do is, see every potential “date” as also a potential “colleague” in the whole meeting people effort. It takes the pressure off any 2 people having some kind of first date or meeting up. We should just all network with each other to “refer business” to each other, both in terms of cool people and in terms of cool things single people are doing.

All four storm doors are still the kind made from galvanized aluminum. The stuff that leaves a powder grit dryness on your hands.

To make myself get around to it, I first brought up two of the screens and stashed them behind a door. They’re light. It would take a hell of an excuse to somehow claim that bit’s not doable.

That momentum gained, I puzzle out which one goes where, and I remove the heavy glass panels one at a time. Once each screen’s in, I feel a powerful, capable, responsible lightness. It makes working the glass sheets down the winding stair to their cubby in the basement natural. Easy. Important.

Once back down there, bringing up the next screen’s a no-brainer. Just like that, I’m pushing ahead with the season change. Head-up, capable, taking care.

One to go. The last screen door’s in the basement, adjacent to the storage slot. Though it’s late and dark, there’s not much point in giving up now, so I don’t.

When I tighten the last mounting bracket and wipe nonexistent galvanic debris on my pants. I feel: I did it. Done. By myself.

I feel galvanized.

What else is there to say, really?

So much for Dove’s wonderful campaign for real beauty. Yes, we loved it too. Until someone pointed out that Dove=Unilever=Axe. Then the wheels fell right off that train. First, enjoy “Onslaught” as rendered by Dove’s creative team:

OK cool, they’re hep to social media. And, there have been some hilarious send-ups of Evolution, the first Dove video. So, let’s see what UGC mashups evolve this time, eh? Oh, OOOPS:

Best part? This supposedly hip-to-social-media company, have they responded? Have they said something responsible like “oh hey, good point. We’re going to restrict when our ads run so girls and young women are less likely to get this shitty message from us.” Not to my knowledge. Am I wrong?

If Unilever doesn’t care because “the Axe demographic won’t really care,” which is a reasonable argument, then what the hell about the whole demographic the Dove campaign is aimed at. Because Axe’s images of women are far, far worse than those used in the original “Onslaught” video.

And, hooray to CNN for picking up this story recently:

Unilever’s response: the Axe commercials are meant to be a spoof and not taken seriously. Oh yeah, right.

Heh. Two-year-old makes an early debut on NPR show. Ever since blogging about kidnoise early on, I want to start collecting this stuff. Please do send if you see anything…

When life hands you lemons, ask for tequila and salt and call me over!!

I don’t know what a sim is, or the exact definition of machinima. But I don’t have to. You don’t have to either.

This is beautiful. A “video” of creating Van Gogh’s Starry Starry Night within second life.

Found on Christopher Penn’s blog.

Blog Action Day, today. Theme to write about: the environment. Huge category. Enormous. Fraught with lots of personal guilt and shallow feel-good gesturing too. What can we, any of us do, for real, about the environment?

Look, if you want quick tips, hit up Google, read a book on it or check out some blogs and podcasts on the topic:

Inhabitat | Greenpeace | Treehugger  | EcoTumble | Lighter Footstep | Vote for Trees | Five Limes 

But for this moment, would you take your thoughts on this issue to a different level? Can you step away from knee-jerk pro or con or eco-gestures and consider a bigger picture? About what kind of person you want to be in the world? Can you try to think about your life as connected, and take into consideration how you care for and regard yourself, others around you and total strangers?

Do you accuse and assign blame? Do you look for quick fixes to assuage your own guilt? Or are you earnestly trying to keep your mind open about what could be better, where to find ideas, how to spread them? What actions in your quiet private everyday can make you healthier and more able to contend with complex issues like the environment? Can you source your actions from love and can you take the time to understand how you affect the broader world? Can you see beyond your selfish opinions and wants and try to imagine how your actions and positions play out on larger and larger scales?

Can you start cleaning up the environment inside your head, be patient with yourself, but earnestly start?

Can that lead to looking at your life just a little bit more clearly every day, and beginning to adopt, sustainably, the kinds of individual actions, thoughts and habits that can lead to less personal environmental impact in the future?

Activism tweaks the nose of patience. But, I think patience does more with time. Next time you fly (and, natch, offset your carbon), stare down the hills and valleys and contours traced by gazillions of rivulets over time and know the whole friggin landscapes can be shaped by water. How will you apply this to shaping your own life?

No Tara, it’s not just you:

Is it just me, or does everyone else notice that women who make it to some reasonable level of power in North America are painted as either sluts, junkies, airheads, bitches, witches* or some other awfully negative female stereotype?

We attack and demean what we feel is threatening. So, 1) why is our culture so threatened by strong women? and 2) do we attack and demean women in fundamentally more harsh, shallow, callow ways?

Why the pressure on strong women to be “everything” and not just who they are. Remember Hillary being compelled to share her chocolate chip cookie recipe to somehow prove she was also a decent mom & wife? Blegh.

But this, from the comments, bothered me even more:

It’s a difficult balancing act to need to be seen as a pro-active, ambitious leader, yet a gentle and caring woman, and I think it results in some women with good intentions looking a lot more ruthless than they are.

Ok waiddaminnit. Do we ask our male leaders to pull off this sleight of hand too? Really? To the same degree?